The Market Madman

The Market Madman

Alexandr Piatkov



He stands in the middle of an empty marketplace—thin, ragged, barefoot, unwashed,

and starving—remaking the world according to his own understanding. He explains

to every passerby that money is meant to be spent, not saved. If anyone asks the

price of the toilet paper he sells, it triggers a tirade about an inevitable

monetary exchange where everyone will lose everything. From this, it follows that

one should not ask questions; one must buy quickly. He buys the rolls of toilet

paper right here at the market and resells them at a higher price. Pencils, pins,

matches, and similar items also appear on his counter. He has no documents

granting him the right to trade, and he never has, though he has been selling

here for about twenty years. Anyone who engages with him is forced to endure an

endless lecture on a human being's right to trade freely, the lack of any right

to ask for a price, the injustice of the Soviet world where he was forced to haul

stones, and the magnificence of the market, which suffers from only one flaw:

stupid people asking for prices instead of frantically sweeping everything off

the counter in terror of the upcoming currency reform. This philosophy, paired

with the unbearable stench of a body that has never known soap, sparks a single

desire in any regulatory office: to get rid of this character as quickly as

possible. Even from the remand prison where he eventually ended up, they kicked

him out just to stop the non-stop talking. They simply couldn't take it. If we

extrapolate this situation a bit, we can picture a well-groomed, wealthy,

perfectly haircuts-and-tailored TV host, spouting absolute nonsense on air with a

straight face, genuinely expecting his words to take effect and the world to

change at his command. But continuing this extrapolation further, we arrive at

the reality of hydrocarbon-rich Venezuela, where even toilet paper is scarce—much

like it once was in that unfortunate country where a street madman was once

forced to haul stones.




Publication Details
Original text published on proza.ru/avtor/alexanderan
Copyright: Alexandr Piatkov, 2015
Publication Certificate No. 215081601551
English translation version: AI Translator (Advanced Language Model, 2026)